The Model’s Dilemma

My roommate made a fake Tinder profile because he’s super insecure about his looks. He stole pictures from a relatively unknown male model on Instagram and now has 1000s of likes on his Tinder profile using the model’s pictures as his own. This bizarre catfish experiment of my roommate’s is derivative from his desire to be more well-liked, as well as his insecurity that his average physical appearance is the reason the girl he has a crush on doesn’t like him back.

Now, as my roommate admires the appreciation his catfish Tinder profile has achieved and the 1000s of likes from attractive girls, he must also feel helpless as he realizes he never could have achieved this with his own real photos. He feels significantly at a disadvantage because of his less impressive looks. He thinks he was cheated at birth. He’s convinced ugly people are at a natural disadvantage.

Let’s take the opposite approach and analyze. Let’s say an actual male model makes a Tinder profile and gets 1000s of likes. He has received a superfluous amount of validation of his looks, validation he didn’t need because he’s always been known as “good looking”. The model’s dilemma is that he cannot discern who likes him for his good looks from who likes him for his personality. Thus, at this higher end of the looks spectrum, a new problem arises: a lack of genuine intentions from others. Somewhere, I’d like to imagine that there is a disgruntled male Instagram model using my roommate’s actual photos for his own catfish profile to see who likes him for who he is on the inside. It’s easy to criticize models who preach that looks aren’t important when looks are literally the basis of their careers. But step in their shoes for a second; understand that looks have hindered their ability to foster genuine relationships.


We live in a society where people are still judged by their physical appearance. It’s not necessarily bad; it’s just the way things are right now. Whichever end of the looks spectrum you fall on Bro, just remember that everyone struggles as a result of this natural human flaw. We must work to accept everyone and view looks as secondary to personality. Most of all, we must stop using Tinder if we’re insecure.

The Underappreciated Freestyle Workout

When I was younger I played basketball for a Jewish travel team. We weren’t the most physically gifted (being a team of white Jews) so what we lacked in natural ability we made up for in hard work. We spent a lot of time practicing for basketball tournaments. A lot of time. The practices weren’t fun, but being able to stay competitive with good teams because we had practiced made the tournaments so much better. So we worked hard to play hard. And that brings me to my point.

When do we get to play in the gym?

Gym workouts are like a basketball practice. You do routine drills over and over and you start to see results. The difference is that basketball practice results translate to better basketball games, but gym workout results just translate to…heavier gym workouts. Obviously working out changes your physical appearance, but physical appearance improvements can come from so many different forms of physical activity. We love to show off our gym gains, but when do we actually get to use them?

This is why I decided to incorporate occasional freestyle workouts into my gym schedule. One day a week. These workouts are nothing like my normal ones. They don’t follow a routine. I create a random physical challenge and attempt to do it. This can range anywhere from trying handstand push-ups to climbing a tree using just my arms. Since I still love basketball, sometimes my freestyle workouts will involve dribbling a weighted ball. Nothing is off limits during a freestyle workout.

The point of these workouts is to make the gym fun. Freestyle workouts shouldn’t replace your gym routine; rather, they should serve as a supplement to it. Next time you get the chance, try a freestyle workout, and see if it feels good. Because sometimes when we practice and practice and practice and practice, we forget how it feels to let loose.

What Are You Voting For?

I despise politics. It’s full of greedy, attention-seeking, big-pocketed scumbags advertising themselves as a means to bring change. But my disdain goes deeper than the politicians; I hate voting for a system I consider to be broken. Every 4 years, our nation panics and casts their votes for their favorite candidate, and then their votes are discarded and replaced by an electoral college vote.

My parents, however, see things differently than I; and my mom has practically been begging me to vote for her precious Democrats because God forbid another Republican enters office and ruins the world, while my dad constantly complains to me about whatever bullshit Trump did yesterday or the day before that.

Ok that’s enough ranting; by this point you understand that I think politics are dumb. I think voting is dumb. I think my parents are dumb for voting.


When I really thought about it though, what does it mean to vote?

To vote is to asserverate (declare) a belief you hold to be true and important. When we vote, we are telling the world, “I believe in this and think it matters.” So the simple truth is, we are voting constantly. We are never not voting.

Every day, when we wake up and get dressed, we vote. Our clothes are a statement on what we believe a person (ourselves) should wear. When we show up to class, we vote for the importance of whatever subject is being taught, or we vote for the importance of the degree we’re pursuing. Either way, if we didn’t believe in class, we’d skip it. When we’re driving, and there’s a fork in the road, and we go left instead of right, we voted for going left.

Every action we take is a statement. Every sentence we speak is a statement. Every statement we make is a vote for that statement. When we make a decision, adopt a new lifestyle choice, etc., we are casting a vote and declaring that what we do is worthwhile.

So there it is. 7 billion people voting constantly, just trying to prove that what they do is worthwhile.

The truth is, it doesn’t matter whether you’re a part of the winning side of a vote. What’s important is that we vote for ourselves, not for others.

I say this, after I just promised my mom I’d vote in her precious midterm election. Well guess what bitches… This midterm vote of mine won’t be a vote for the Democratic party (literally it will be, but figuratively…) it will be a vote for my mom, because I love her!

Pi (1998) Reaction: From Infinity to Duality

PiArnofsky

I just watched Pie, the first film by Darren Aronofsky, for the second time. I have thought deep into many concepts tonight, and have come up with a new ratio: the ratio between opposites and infinity. I will try to explain this as carefully as I can, because the Illuminati is considering recruiting me.

We humans have 2 normal eyes, and a Third Eye. We use the 2 normal eyes for logical, physical thought about the tangible realms. We use observations made by this set of eyes to process our physical world. We use logic to see. However, all we see with these 2 eyes can be likened to Plato’s metaphor of the Cave. The observer, who is inside the Cave, can never conceive of the true outside world. It is incomprehensible.

Everything we see in our quasi-3D, 2-eyed world is logical. We can use measurements to quantize all sort of data from our physical world. The physical world is filled with apparent opposites, on/off states, 1s and 0s.

It is binary.

Our Third Eye takes us out of this binary cave and places us into the infinite realm. What we cannot quantize is emotion. Emotion is infinite.

The Third Eye is our view from above. It’s feed comes from outside of Plato’s Cave. We can use it to see the simplicity of our 2-eyed, 3D world, the underlying patterns behind it. We use our Third Eye to perceive the duality. This outside processing is not logical, no; it is emotional.

We use emotions to perceive logic. Consciousness powers the facilitation of data between our 2-eyed and Third Eye systems. This communication occurs between duality and infinity. Our consciousness is the mediator between these two realms.

Consciousness, as far as we know, can only access one of these realms at a time. For this is why we cannot be both asleep and awake, both alive and dead. We can only be one or the other. We can only switch between duality and infinity; we cannot be both at once.

The path between duality and infinity is a spiral. This spiral is the vessel of creation in this realm. Followed outward, a spiral creates an infinitely expanding pattern from a single point. Pure emotion. Conversely, if we follow a spiral inward, we reduce an infinitely large pattern to that single point. That single point the final step before the void, which exists between infinity and duality. Pure logic. This point is brought up in Pi, when Max and Sol are playing Go and discussing probability. Sol states that at the beginning of a Go game, there are seemingly infinite possibilities for the arrangement of the pieces. Max, however, counters that right before the end of the game, there is only one possible move left.

Throughout nature, we find examples of the golden ratio. Life follows this sequence as it expands. Can we retract life with that sequence? Can we switch from emotion to logic? Is logic truly death, or is it life, as something else?

If consciousness is a light switch, life is when the the switch to ON and death is when the switch is OFF. Life is emotion. Infinite. Death is logic. Binary. The switch itself, the in-between, is consciousness.

How can we become fully aware of consciousness itself? We must reduce consciousness to pure logic. This will be the death of consciousness, yes, but also the awakening of a new understanding of the ratio between the infinity and the duality.

We must create a new state within the void that exists in between the ON/OFF state. We must enter this state and exist within it in order to achieve a true understanding of the link between the two most important opposites.

By reducing emotion to logic, we can understand the in-between. Pi postulates that we can do this with numbers.

Damn Oldheads

There’s a reason why records are always broken. There’s a reason why stuff comes in trends. Nothing lasts forever. And it’s because of the damn oldheads.

Let’s say you create a product. Adobe Photoshop, for example. And at the time you release this product, it’s by far and away the greatest shit out there for whatever your product meant to be used for. It gets recognized as the best and everyone starts using it. People associate the name of your product with it’s action, like “photoshopping” an image. Then one day some motherfucking Bro comes along and realizes he can do whatever you and your product did, but better. And to do that, he copies your product and changes just enough to make it look like his own thing and lowers the price so people will buy it. This motherfucker has the audacity to name his product “Sketch”. And before you know it, everyone is using Sketch instead of Photoshop. The only people still on Photoshop are the damn oldheads because Photoshop makes sense to them and they don’t want to relearn anything. Meanwhile, the tables have turned and everyone at Adobe is freaking out and trying to copy Sketch, but every time they push a new feature aimed at Sketch users, the damn oldheads complain and refuse to upgrade. These are the same motherfuckers still running Windows 7 because they can’t keep up with the times. Fucking oldheads.

Words of advice: if you have a product, and you know you need to update it to keep up with the trends, or if you’re so ballsy you actually are trying to set the times, fucking do it. Fuck the fucking oldheads. They don’t have to use your new shit. Don’t keep using a CD player when an iPod comes out. Don’t be that guy. Get with the times and get ahead.

Clarification Bro(lina)

Just wanted to clarify some stuff Bros. So obviously it’s 2018 and like there’s lots of different people out there. Lots of different Bros. You don’t have to be a Bro to enjoy this site. Brolinas are welcome! So are non-Bros and LGBrosTQ Bros. If you can say, “Bro, I really like this site Bro,” then this site is totally for you Bro. It doesn’t matter if you’re whiteBro, blackBro, oreoBro, you’re my Bro, Bro. I love you, Bro.

Bro Day

Today my Broseph said, “Bro, Seth, Rogan is so hairy bro.”

I said, “I know Broseph. He’s Harry, Potter if Harry Potter was in love with James Franco.”

My Broseph said, “Bro, Frank O,cean has such a good voice dude. Every song he makes is a hit.”

I said, “Totally Broseph. Hit,ler was a genius and I hope to be like him one day.”

Then my Broseph did the Nazi salute. I kid you not bro, a single tear of joy ran down my eye bro. It was beautiful bro.

Advice I should follow

Hi Bros. This is just some stuff I’ve been thinking lately, phrased vaguely!

Advice 1: When you spend your life nowhere and finally end up somewhere, you expect to be heard. But it takes patience for your voice to register. People aren’t used to hearing a new sound. You can’t force them to hear you. You won’t always be somewhere where they can listen. Keep trying to get there, and don’t give up when it seems like you’re talking to nobody. When you are meant to be heard, you will be.


Advice 2: Patience directly contradicts addiction. We take breaks between substances because we want to enhance their effects when we reindulge in them. We don’t want to jade the things that bring us joy by overconsuming. If only patience was addicting–Addiction wouldn’t be! Yet patience is the opposite. Patience is boring. It doesn’t bring us joy, but the fruits of our patience will. It takes time for flowers to blossom, for fruits to grow. Practice being patient, and remind yourself that it will be worth it.